Apocalypse Weekend

We've all read the lists of skills you need in an apocalypse. Farming, foraging, weapons training. How to make a water filter, rainwater collection, the list goes on. Every prepper blog on the planet has beaten those subjects to death harder than their annoying neighbour that recently turned into a zombie. But what about the things we haven't thought about yet? The unsexy, overlooked skills that will separate the people who survive and thrive from the people who'll be eating hard instant noodles underneath a leaky roof? When the apocalypse does finally happen, it won't be the machete-wielding, crazy eyed loudmouth who thrives. It'll be the weirdo down the street who knows how to wire a car battery to a solar panel and can pull a rotten tooth with a steady hand. So here are seven apocalypse survival skills nobody talks about, and honestly, you should probably start reading into a few of them this weekend.   1. Sewing skills (hand or machine) to fix your wasteland out...

When the world starts burning down in front of you, the last thing you want is to be stuck in traffic, idling away your expensive gasoline, waiting for the fallout to reach your rear tires. Running around doesn't seem like a good idea either. Unless you're the star of the treadmill, running around the wasteland trying to haul gear, supplies and foraged foods in your very expensive military grade backpack, you're going to need a functional set of wheels. Combustion powered vehicles are out because the simple fact is, there won't be any gasoline to go around. Sure you could run your own diesel fuel lab in the backyard but eventually even the sunflower oil will be gone and pressing new oil is just a waste of precious resources that are better used as sustenance rather than propellant. Every apocalypse-preppers wet dream is running around through the wasteland on a tricked out motorcycle or a zombie ready truck but the reality is much less appealing and sexy than looking ba...

When the world finally goes belly up, whether it's nuclear fallout, a deadly pandemic, or the grid just giving up and dying, the last thing you want is to be caught off guard nutrition wise. And here's the uncomfortable truth that survival bros on the internet do not want to hear: a plant based diet is the single smartest survival strategy for the apocalypse. Not because it's woke, not because the deer will thank you, but because the math is undeniably simple. Meat is a losing bet in a collapsed world, and plants are the only food source you can actually sustain when every can of beans in a hundred mile radius has been fought over by people with more ammunition and worse intentions than you.   Meat won't save you: the nutrition problem First things first. Preppers love to imagine themselves gnawing on a freshly cooked squirrel leg like some kind of wilderness god. Here's the problem: meat lacks essential nutrients that humans actually need to stay functional. Where...

Do you remember when you bought a device, took it out of the box, plugged it in, and it just... worked? Yeah, those days are gone. Smart devices nowadays are constantly updating, constantly breaking, constantly spying, and somehow every single update makes the apps that run on them feel stupider than the version before. If you have ever screamed at a television because it needed a software update before it would let you watch anything, this rant is for you. Smart devices aren't broken. They are working exactly as designed. Just not for you.   The update that broke your device at 3 a.m. Let's start with the single most annoying thing about modern smart devices: the updates. Your phone, your TV, your watch, your thermostat, your washing machine, everything runs software now, and software needs updates. That would be fine if updates actually improved things. Instead, the update arrives at the worst possible moment, takes twenty minutes, and then something that worked perfectly yes...